7 Ways to Endanger Your Children

#5 will shock you

This is part of a series on what I call “evangelical safety culture.” To catch up you can read part 1, part 2, part 3, and part 4.

Photo by Benjamin Davies on Unsplash (edited)

When I type “the biggest threats to children” in an internet search engine, the results I receive include unprecedented global hunger, disrupted education due to violent conflict, abusive parents, drowning, and car accidents. And yet, if you frequent toddler playdates or follow “momfluencers” on social media you wouldn’t be faulted for having a different list of threats at the forefront of your mind. The significant privilege we enjoy in the developed world and the influence of safetyism in our culture can lead us to protect our kids from risks and experiences that are statistically unlikely to pose a threat and in some cases might actually contribute to their growth into mentally, physically, and spiritually healthy adults. Here are just a few.¹

1. Unsupervised outdoor play
   A walk to the mailbox. A ride around the block on their bicycle or scooter. A few moments out from under your watchful eye. Many parents are convinced that’s all it could take for tragedy to strike. Nevermind that studies have shown the immense benefits of independent play and the increase in anxiety that can happen when children are not allowed to face reasonable obstacles in safe environments. The likelihood that they will be taken by a nefarious actor peddling puppies and popsicles from the door of an unmarked white van seems to far outweigh the significant benefits of independence.

2. Red dye 40

   Those fruit snacks and otter pops are harboring an ingredient that could be making your 4-year-old act like… well, a 4-year-old. And many parents are determined that it isn’t the sugar. It’s definitely the 1.575 mg of artificial food dye they ingested, even though the FDA has determined a child could eat up to 112 mg a day with no adverse health effects.

3. Government Entities

   I seriously considered not including this one, because emotions run especially high on this. For now I’ll just say that paranoidly believing that no one who works for a government agency could possibly have the best interests of your children in mind, and spending hours to find opposing evidence for every CDC and AAP and ACF recommendation is probably not great for a parent’s mental health.

4. Veggie Tales and Disney Movies

   There’s potentially something questionable about all children’s media, because if someone is creating content for children, it’s usually because they have an agenda. Disney wants to use Anna and Elsa to influence your child’s gender identity,² and Bob and Larry definitely want them to know that God made them special and He loves them very much.

5. Sunday School

   I don’t know what percentage of Christian parents are opposed to Sunday School, and I’m sure that they don’t all have the same reasons for keeping their toddlers and elementary aged children in the main worship service with them. But I know at least some of them are concerned about not being able to have a role in everything their kids learn. Maybe it’s just me, but it seems like a theologically less-than-perfect Sunday School lesson doesn’t present a high enough risk to justify ignoring your 3 year old’s social and cognitive developmental needs and bribing or threatening them to sit quietly through a 40 minute sermon.

6. Regular School

   I already wrote a whole post about this one. You can read it here.

Why I Won’t Homeschool Until I Do

7. Friends

   Over the last few decades more and more parents have decided that friendship with peers does not provide a great enough benefit to their kids to outweigh the risk of them being inadvertently or intentionally exposed to questionable media, ideas, or conversations. In some more fundamentalist strains of evangelical safety culture, a child’s many siblings entirely replace their need for friendships with non related peers.

As I’ve been reflecting more on the incoherent differences between radical Christianity and evangelical safety culture I realized I would need a lot more space to do each of these examples justice. So, this is barely scratching the surface, but I hope it sparks some questions, reflection, or interesting conversations. Next week I’m going to further explore the attitude behind #5 through some reflections on The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt.

Beauty in Parenthood
It has been a full few weeks of parenting. Our schedules and physical surroundings have been disrupted with moving, and when this is published we’ll be starting a 24 hour travel day to get to Germany (prayers appreciated!). The result is heightened toddler emotions and patience stretched thin like a tightrope between two deep breaths. But we’re hanging on, with grace to hold us up and lots of eye-to-eye conversations and requests for forgiveness.

My little men playing with blocks at the dentist’s office.

In pursuit of Beauty,

1. If you aren’t a parent of young children, these are all actual things parents I personally know sometimes worry about.

2. There is some credible evidence that there is truth to this claim, but like many things, it is usually exaggerated to unhealthy levels in the context of evangelical safety culture.